The Comrade
by Arceusfish
Summary: Not even Lelouch is safe from the consequences that come with his actions. If it wasn't for that witch he would've been lost a long time ago...


Hello, everyone! It's been a while since I've uploaded anything, but I've been writing random things here and there. I was trying to work on something original last week, but I was having a hard time finding the words, so I decided to practice with a fanfic. Of course, this came to me easily l:( but whatever. I thought of this when I couldn't sleep, so I hope you enjoy the random things that come from my mind (especially you CluClu fans). **This one's a little more graphic (sorry, not in the lewd way) than most of the other things I've written, just as a little warning.**

Enjoy!

-Arceusfish

* * *

He thought that he was somewhat over this, or at the very least, had pushed these feelings into a dark place where it was easier to suppress them. He was too naïve to think that. Even C.C., he knew, was not immune to the effects of her actions. If she wasn't after all this time, then he probably never would be.

The battle he had waged at Narita was meant to show the world that Zero, as well as the Black Knights, could perform miracles and really were the real deal. However, it did not come without consequence. Of course Lelouch, in his way of overthinking the hell out of everything, naturally thought of this fact. However, to have the consequences hit so close to home when he constantly tried to avoid that from happening had shocked him yet again, although he tried not to show it. For all his overthinking and scheming, he didn't know that Shirley's father would die, suffocated under enormous weights of mud that Lelouch himself had ordered to be sent downhill. Nor did he even want to think about all the other people who met the same fate. Some may even have been relatives to others that he had seen or was in acquaintance with. And then there was Shirley's feelings that were undeniably devout, but directed towards the very person that she also probably hated with a writhing passion…

C.C. had picked on Lelouch for being too soft only hours ago, as the rain poured down outside and the pizza grew stale on the coffee table. Lelouch had said that he was prepared for the consequences of his actions since he killed his brother Clovis, but deep down he knew that there was always something that would hurt more than the last, something that would surprise him every time. The thought of Clovis made Lelouch sick to his stomach; the way that a simple, tiny piece of metal shot at high speed could explode someone's head like a chunky red firework - Lelouch had tried to gloss the memory over in darkness, but it refused to fade out.

Despite that, maybe having one's head explode was better than choking on thick dirt or being cooked by the Guren's deadly claw…

Lelouch sat up with the speed of a lightning bolt. Even in his sleep, he was not safe from the torment of these heinous tragedies. One hand moved to keep his heart from beating out of his chest and the other gripped the sheets at his side with such ferocity it might have ripped a hole. Unable to perceive anything beyond the loud ragged breaths that were coming out of his mouth and the icy feeling on his skin, he wasn't aware of the green-haired woman until she wrapped herself around him in an attempt to keep him from completely losing it. But he was already past that point.

He thought he may have heard her utter "What happened?" but it sounded so far away he couldn't be sure. Before he could say anything, a pain struck him in the head and he was hit with an intense wave of nausea he knew he wouldn't be able to suppress. His body moving faster than his mind, he suddenly found himself slumped over in the bathroom, making one of the most horrible sounds one could make. And losing the dinner he had worked hard to prepare. Well, at least Nunnally and C.C. could enjoy it fully for him.

As the nausea started to fade he became aware of C.C. sitting silently next to him, her hand on his back, as well as his uncontrollable shaking. The last thing he wanted was for anyone to see him like this, but if it had to be anyone, he'd pick C.C. She saw through him all the time anyway.

He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and flushed the toilet, falling back against the sink and resting his head on the cabinet door beneath it. C.C. looked at him worriedly and wrapped her arms around him. He felt his shaking start to subside, quickly replaced by an intense fatigue. Often now he was tormented by nightmares or insomnia, and whenever he woke up in cold sweat during the night, C.C. was there with him. She never really did much, but her being there was enough to help him get over it just that once. He shivered inwardly thinking about what it would be like without her. There were so many things about her and her contract that were still mysterious and, frankly, alarming, but Lelouch's judgement told him that she was worth trusting. Or maybe it was his need for someone to understand him for once.

C.C.'s golden eyes studied him carefully as he met her gaze, so close it was a bit mesmerizing. He glanced away. "Don't look at me like that, it's not like I'm dying." His voice came out like more of a croak; it sounded so disgusting he wanted to puke, but he'd already done that.

C.C. sighed. "Have you _never_ had a panic attack before?" She looked at him dully, already knowing the answer yet still asking the question.

 _Tsk_. "Of course not. Nothing bad's ever happened to me, C.C. I'm perfectly fine all the time so this is _soooo_ weird…" he muttered sarcastically.

With an indifferent bat of her eyes, C.C. moved to stand up, but Lelouch pulled her closer, preventing her from escaping. She must have noticed that he was still shaking, because she didn't try to resist. "This is really annoying." Lelouch said after a few moments of silence.

" _What_ is?" C.C.'s voice was muffled as she spoke, her face buried in Lelouch's shoulder.

"You pretend to care about me, but it's for completely selfish reasons." Lelouch huffed.

C.C. smiled. "Heh…isn't that what love is, Lelouch?"

"…"

"Obviously you don't know." C.C. chided. "And I don't pretend to care about you. I actually do, because if you kill yourself, there will be no one to fulfill our contract. I have to make sure you don't mess up too bad, because you get too emotional over everything."

"You're a harsh woman."

"Well, I am C.C." The woman moved until she was right in front of Lelouch.

"Like I'd kill myself. I'd never leave Nunnally alone." Lelouch narrowed his eyes as he saw a hint of skepticism in those amber orbs. "Do you think I'd leave the job of changing the world to anyone else? If someone else could do it, they would have by now! I need to at least do that for Nunnally - I don't care what happens afterwards."

"You're going to fulfill _our contract_ afterwards." C.C.'s gaze was sharp, making Lelouch sigh at her stubbornness.

"Honestly, you are extremely difficult…I hate to admit it, but you know I'd probably be dead by now without you." His eyes softened a little and he detected a hint of surprise from the witch. Before he could give it much thought, it quickly disappeared and an insult replaced it.

"Of course you'd be dead, Lelouch," C.C. sneered. "You're an impulsive brat."

"And you're a witch."

They sat there for a while longer in silence, until Lelouch was finally able to stand up. "Well, I'm tired so I'll be going to bed now."

"As will I." C.C. responded quickly and followed him back to his room. Lelouch fell back into bed and groaned as C.C. rolled to the other side, taking all the sheets with her. He forcefully pulled them back until they each had an equal amount.

"Goodnight, C.C. …and thank you." Lelouch's voice was barely more than a whisper.

C.C. turned to look at him. "Just don't wake me up in the middle of the night again to vomit, or I'll tell your sister that I had to hold you like a baby while you cried."

He felt defeated by those words. "Understood…" A few more heavy, silent moments passed. "C.C.," Lelouch started, breaking the silence. "I meant it at Narita when I said that I need you…" he didn't mean for those words to come out so randomly, but nevertheless they did.

C.C.'s gaze softened and her hand moved to the side of Lelouch's face, causing him to flinch a little at the sudden gesture. "I told you that it's too late to go back on what you've done so far, so you have no choice but to figure out how to deal with these problems. I won't leave you…not until our contract is fulfilled. You know that."

"You mean the contract that I still don't know the details of?" Lelouch raised an eyebrow.

"Exactly."

Lelouch turned away from C.C. in protest. "Something sounds wrong about that."

"I suppose that's true…goodnight, Lelouch." C.C. rolled over to face the wall and Lelouch heard her quickly fall asleep. How she did it, he was never sure. He was just glad that she was there, scathing insults and all.

* * *

Lelouch twirled his pencil in his fingers as he looked out the window next to his desk. It filled the room with rays of golden sunlight and gave him a view of the main greenery on Ashford's campus, something that always proved interesting. Right now the equestrian club was mounting horses to do their daily patrol around the school grounds, and it was far more interesting than his history class - so much so that he barely heard a word the teacher was saying. As the club rode their horses around the backside of the dorms across the green, the view became slightly less interesting and Lelouch's ears picked up on something his teacher was saying.

"-without the help of the neighboring nations, the project would never have succeeded, and the war to take back the stolen land would have been even more costly. It was due to these allies of that nation that they were able to reclaim their land. The comradery led to an enormous development in our world's history…"

Hearing enough, Lelouch gazed back out the window into the blue sky completely clear of clouds. _Hmm, that's what they really are then - the Black Knights, C.C., - they're more valuable than I at first had thought._ An image of C.C., lounging on his bed and reading a Cheese-kun magazine, popped into his head. A small smile crept across his face as he let the sunlight move across his desk. _Perhaps that's one thing I never knew I needed - a comrade…_


End file.
